✨June 22nd, 2023 - Thursday Thought ~ Trust✨
Good Morning Mystics!
I've chosen the above card today because I've been exploring two areas of trust: 1) spiritual, and 2) personal. As I deepen the connect with myself and my spirituality, I've been learning what it means to trust. I'm very much a person who wishes to control aspects of my life without letting the Divine, Source, the Universe, God (insert your preference here!) have room to bring things into my life. In the past, I've very much believed it's up to me and only me.
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My journey has been on-going for about nine years, and most recently (last year), it started to kick off in a new direction. It's been about learning how to release and let go of attachment to things. Of not being afraid to just go for it and forge my own path. Of being authentic and wholly myself. It's been learning to do the work while allowing space for the Universe to bring things into my life to help me on my path. Because I do believe the world works in mysterious ways and that life can bring unexpected and magical things to you if you're open and receptive to it. And, if it's meant for you.
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Things have slowly been building as I deepen this practice of learning to surrender and trust the Universe. Of letting go. And different experiences have absolutely amazed me because things have happened in a way that I couldn't have imagined. It's showed me that holding onto this strict vision isn't for my highest good because it's so restrictive and that's not how the Universe works. It brings the things meant for you in a way that's even better than you thought. For example, two days in a row this week have brought me experiences that demonstrated my co-creative abilities with the Universe! Of how trusting that things will work out, and if it doesn't, something better will take it's place, has tangible evidence.
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It's something I'm still living into, learning into, growing into. And I know things take time and that a particular experience won't happen because it's not meant for me. Which is okay. I'm learning to be okay with that through all of this.
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Now for part 2, which is personal trust. As someone who has been formally diagnosed with the Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) at a young age, I experience anxiety daily—as do many others who do and don't have a diagnosis. Fear, doubt, worry, you name it. And sometimes this would make me feel like I couldn't trust myself. It's been challenging to differentiate between anxiety and my intuition, but I'm learning to notice the cues, the signs, and feelings that come with both. It's been a re-learning of the experiences and stories I told myself when I was younger. Of beginning to cultivate that trust with myself and knowing that just because I have this diagnosis, it doesn't define me.
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And I use the word define because for the longest time I did define myself by "my" anxiety. I thought we were synonymous—one and the same. I became so entrenched in defining myself by it that if I was to google the word "anxiety" I was sure my name would be underneath it. Of course, it wouldn't be, but it's how I felt. It's been a slow unbinding process, but I'm getting there. Everyday, I trust myself a little more. And my how my confidence has skyrocketed!
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It's anxiety and fear that really pushed me last year to this part of my spiritual journey. I finally reached a point where I wanted to change. Everyday, I'm willing to learn how to integrate a new way and state of being into my life because I know I can be so much more. I don't want to let fear stop me anymore and that's what I've been focused on (among other things). I'll admit I'm nervous in sharing this post because it's way more personal than I thought it'd be. But I'm writing from the heart, and I know that's what matters. Thank you for reading 💖
Note: This post will not resonate with everyone and that's okay. Take what does and leave the rest. Trust your intuition!
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